Dream by Ernst van Zyl
I jump over the abyss – It is You! It is You!
02h00 28 June 2007
It is the end times. Our little group is part of a gigantic crew on a gigantic wooden boat. We, as a small group of just about 4 or 5, have regularly practised together as a team at our usual gathering place, a simple and small demarcated seat on the giant boat. (I think that the boat represents the earth, as well as all doctrines of faith.) We practise to row, sit in council, do simple things and are like children; our leader is a strong and loving, soft, big person. We are like little children, weak and smaller than the others. It is the end time, and something enormous like a disaster has taken place. Everything is in crises. Groups belonging to this boat gather in something like a huge tent. The big boat is inside the tent. All the groups are lined up next to each other. Everybody is dressed in different church garments, beautifully decorated; some have headdresses on their heads, and look like Catholics. Our group is just dressed in simple Boer clothes. Everybody must now sing the “Hallelujah-song” together. But the singing cannot get going. Our group keeps quiet, we want to sing the right song, but everyone else is singing wrong, each time they start the wrong song with a beat, then the voices fade away and after the first few repetitions of the word “Hallelujah” the singing dies away completely. I recognize a few of the old people of the NG church, my father-in-law is among them. They try, but they cannot get it right or start. There is a flamboyant leader of a smartly dressed group right next to us. They do not look familiar, it is not our people, the leader is big mouthed and hard. His eyes appear dark and dead, his skin and features are also different, he looks like I think Judas would have looked like. He speaks but he misuses Jesus’ name as a swear word. I reprimand him directly about this, and explain the meaning of the Name to him, that he may not use it this way. He is hostile and mean towards me and our group.
Jesus is being crucified, I see the crowd passing. I know that He is now suffering immensely, at first He feels far away from me because I cannot see Him, there is a long and wide crowd passing with the procession. We hear the noise but we cannot see anything, al the people are in front of us. I think, Oh Jesus, have I done enough, it feels as if I have done almost nothing. His blood is everywhere, on the wooden cross and on the floor. Will I be able to stand if I should see you?
All the people are next to a giant abyss, there are immensely high cliffs and far below there is dark green water, almost like Kimberley’s big hole. In places there are fences so that the people will not fall off. Against one of the cliffs there is a clear little waterfall. We (part of the mass of people) stand and look and someone jumps off the cliff like one committing suicide. He falls himself to death, his body is broken and there is blood on the cliffs. Everyone is shocked. It was the guy that looked like Judas.
I see a black man who has fallen himself half to death, it looks as if he has fallen from the sky, a tree broke his fall but he is not dead. Someone else (the rest of the people) think he is dead, but I see him, he is lying low in the branches of the tree, he still has a little bit of life in him. [ I suspect that it has something to do with the fall of the blacks, they fall very hard but with the transformation of the earth all of them do not have to begin right at the lowest end of the matter-evolution again. I am not sure about this.]
There is a call that I must jump over the abyss. The command is from Father. He expects me to come and do it, I have a choice but I must still do it as a final test. I quickly move towards the edge. Goal-directed I move closer on the little path and down the steps, but I am concerned, will I stop and step back because of fear? With determination I move towards the abyss, but I feel the fear. I think it must be a little like how Jesus also felt. I feel something of His death-suffering. I would never have been able to carry it. Goal-directed I move closer. I ask where my wife Martinette is. She is still on the way. I am afraid that she may be mad if I jump and I am dead and I did not even greet her or talk to her. There is no time left, here the abyss is right in front of me. I go, I stand on the rock, and I feel the rough stone underneath my bare feet. It is a dizzy height, no human can survive it. But I jump and I believe. The moment when I fall, I trust You will catch me. The fall is far and as fast as lightning, I see almost nothing, it is just a blur, I have no control, but I knew, the next moment, before I could hit the water far below, you grabbed Me! I feel the soft but enormous Power enfolding me completely, around me and it catches me, my fall is stopped, the Power is unbelievable! I feel light, the Power lifts me up! There is cheering from the people, but the biggest cheering is inside me! I shout it out, tears of joy flow freely, my heart wants to explode because of joy and love! It is You, I knew You would! You are the One! The Power lifts me up and puts me on top, on safe ground. The joy and love is inexpressible! It is You! You have found it worth Your while to save me! The gratitude is overwhelming and unceasing. I am part of Your team, part of You! Thank You Father Jesus! I have taken the step, but You have led me so, since long ago. My victory in Your power and love is also my team’s victory, all my people, Your people, are now safe. The power and safety and love are unforgettable. Thank You Jesus!
I become aware that I am awake and the joy and love and gratitude is still inside me. I still feel the glow of the Power which caught me and lifted me up. My body still feels light. I just want to lie like this and enjoy the glorious feeling of blissfulness, but I am afraid that I will fall asleep and tomorrow morning when I wake up I may have forgotten what I have experienced just now. I get up immediately, see that it is 02:00 in the morning, and with haste I go to my study to write these words down.
Ernst van Zyl